Candler - Anhedonia

Don't fall hope I don't fall
I been high up for so long
In heaven but I don't know God
Got what I want
Now I want what I don't got
Thought all my problems would disappear
But to see through the screen
My dreams turned into fears
None of this was ever real
I can't feel pain or pleasure here
I got Anhedonia
All of my dreams they got Anhedonia
All of my dreams they got Anhedonia
All of my dreams they got Anhedonia
They got Anhedonia
I was the villain in my own movie
Saw my life in scenes
Through these violent dreams
Thought I was the hero
Had to go view it
Never knew that I could be so stupid
Hypersomnia victim
Having trouble keeping my eyes open
Know my mind floating
Demons promised me visits
Promised me gifts
Nodding head in consent
My own blind focus
Had to try and control it
Shadow Boxing with my demons in the dark
To lighten the moment
My own opponent
Fighting the me I once wanted to be
Had made my life the lowest
Man who played God
Had to solemnly wrote it
Thought he'd find solace
Through fraudulent emotions
Intoxicated, made my coffin a home
And God, all of the bonds and the promises broken
I got
Voices in my head
Telling me not to fall asleep
Monsters in my bed
Won't let me wake up
Till I'm long deceased
I'm an imposter, see
See what I wanna see
But I had God in me
What a lonely thought to reach
Head in the clouds
Vision never clears
Always fly so high
But I could never steer
Look, none of this
Was ever real
I can't feel pain or pleasure here
I got Anhedonia
All of my dreams, they got Anhedonia
Anhedonia
All of my dreams, they got Anhedonia
They got Anhedonia
Still asking
The same questions
I been tryna find the answers since
Ten years past and
Still messy
But I ain't been rambling
I guess we're getting there
Lately I've been finding solace but
Shady figures stare
And all my answers so hollow man
Like, why all my demons
Got wings and halos
Why recently
I ain't been seeing angels
Why when I sleep
My breathing gets painful
Why in my dreams
I only bleed in grey, though
Tryna hide the fact
I ain't been seeing colors
It's been white and black
I think I need some others
Had a silent past
But this is deeply further
Tryna find it back
Get out beneath these covers
It's been too many nightmares
Too many daydreams
Not enough light here
Cause I never say things
Too many days passed
Since I had seen daylight
Finding my way back
Finally make right
Just wake up before it's too late
I wanna see the sun today
I don't wanna stay asleep forever
That's a fear I think I need to face
I'm just tryna find a light in the dark
But my mind's been tired
Demons making that hard
Sometimes I write
To lie that I am unharmed
But the light's been brighter
So I guess it's a start
Recently, there ain't been peace in me
I'm tryna seek inside for all the evil things
When all my dreams would speak
And I believe deceit
I don't need sleep to breath
And that's cause all my dreams
They got Anhedonia
All of my dreams, they got Anhedonia

Written by:
Jackson Carrington

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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