Tamy Stevens - Somebody's Mother

I pen this witness to my pain, suffering over gain
I mean I know my own name but couldn't find my own lane
Nothing was enough to make me have drive or feel alive
Each time the Lord wanted me to survive, he opened my womb inside
I screamed out to the heavens like, God just let me die
He gave me little Elijah, first time my wings fly
I dreamt his existence before he was even alive
Before his first breath, my first little death
We all die a little as mothers
We put ourselves last before others
We put our kids dreams up in the air like little ribbons in the sky
And every little kiddie gets to fly
While mommy gets new anchors for her ankles to survive

Nobody told me, said it would be easy
I know these scars won't leave me
I know God gave me you just to keep me
Just to keep me breathing and believing
I never would have recovered
The pain it had me smothered
A love like this I'll never find another
God knew what I needed
He had me covered
A blessing in disguise from my lover
A new life as somebody's mother

I resist the urge to lean into impatience
Felt like a setback till I finally saw your faces
Selfishness cause I'm afraid of making more mistakes
Cause life keep throwing learning curves and I keep missing bases
I ignored the basics and red flags were shiny new toys
To conquer mountains I was never meant to face it
Crazy how we play ourselves trying to change our ways
It's lazy how we settle for the easy route rather than heal our aches
And healing felt like punishment for what I already endured
And I didn't want to pass down the fear of being unsure
So I buckled up and told myself to seek whats pure
For my little girl and certainly for my little boy
Cause who gone break generational curses if I agree with my demons
And then turn around and tell my son to aim for achievements
And if age, sex, and location's why I didn't go for my goals
How I'ma look at my daughter with all these characters holes

Nobody told me
Said it would be easy
I know these scars won't leave me
I know God gave me you just to keep me
Just to keep me breathing and believing
Breathing and believing

Written by:
Tamara Beamon

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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