Abandoning Sunday - I Should Probably Go to Therapy

A couple thousand miles turns out was not enough to learn to let things go
The list of all I'd buried so deep that I forgot was longer than I'd known
I'd convinced myself that I was fine, turns out that I'm a mess
And hurting those that tried to love in spite has become one of the things that I do best

I could blame my parents if that would help at all, God knows they did their share
Somedays I'm still angry and frustrated but most the time I'm much too tired to care
My father was an asshole and a liar and I'm terrified that's what I'll become
So I'll say "I'm sorry" way too much for all the convoluted things I've done

I could swear I tried really hard but I'm not sure if that's entirely true
'Cause no amount of therapy could solve the motives behind anything I do
Man, it sounds so nice to finally heal but I don't know where to start
You might think I'm too hard on myself, but if you knew half the shit that's in my heart

A couple thousand miles turns out not even close to outrun where I'm from
The bruises left encircling my throat were thicker than the arsenic in my blood
Wasted time I prayed to fucking hard but never heard a thing
When all I've felt is silence for so long, it's hard to know for sure what I believe

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