802 Truth - im out of control

Out of my hands i can't calm how i'm feelin'
I like the idea of me hung from the ceilin'
So what i'm in hella pain it's been a year since i been out the institute yes i'm in fear
I ain't gettin' better i'm tired of hurtin'
I'm takin prescriptions but they are not workin'
I do not tell anyone that is my problem
Got so many issues so why can't i solve em
Gave up on tryin it's way too much pressure
At this point i settle for feeling so lesser
I might disappear i might be uncle fester
Who knows if i show up for next years semester
They callin' me nice but it should be a gesture
Don't do shit for profit don't care bout the pleasure
It's mentally drainin' it's all just a pester
I've run out of gas showin' too much damn effort
Girl you don't want me i'm too much to handle
I'm darker than midnight you can't light my candle
You won't see the real me i'm all just a scandal, but i'll get to jammin' like Julius Randle
No feelings inside of me they took em far away
All of these bitches that love me and my old ways
I'm talkin' sleepin' and bangin' on holidays
Just a lil later they cross me like Hardaway
Swear i'm not shit but a brother with issues
With family, women, i can't collab with you
And even though i won't do nothin' against you
I find myself cryin' and clutchin' a pistol
Let out so much water i need me a tissue
Don't trust your self conscious it'll only dismiss you
Same way ya old girl would scream that "i miss you"
The very next day she gon' publicly diss you
You tell me to get it together i'm tryin'
"Truth" is my handle you know i ain't lyin'
She think that it's fake when i say that I'm dyin' but baby I'm out of control
I struggle wit harming my arms do be bleedin'
They say that they here but i think they deceivin'
I never reach out when i know that i need it say baby it's out of control
I'll talk to Alexa before i approach you
You too hard to reason wit i cannot coach you
That's what they be tellin' me like they supposed to
My baby I'm not in control
I try to convince that I'm actually healin'
This music is where imma say what i'm feelin'
If pull the plug is it ground or the ceiling
It's not in my fuckin' control
I rap like im sleep and in truth i'm exhausted
I'm tired of livin' put me in a coffin
I ain't savin' money and therapy costin'
The same way the Celtics ain't green wit out Boston
Life is like poker you win or you lose
but the more that you gamble the more you gon choose
whether keep it or keep addin' digits by twos
and then once it's all gone you'll be singin' the blues
I talk to my demons and talk to my angels
I never pick sides like a chain when it dangle
No average joe but i'm not on the bengals
I don't play QB but i got all the angles
I look on the field and emotions get tangled
If you piss me off better chill or get strangled
Love no more than one bitch this ain't a triangle
Can't trust not a person my heart is too mangled
Fuck all the bullshit i'm coolin' from drama
Shit drivin' me crazy but this ain't a Honda
The only damn woman i trust is my mama
Think that I'm lyin'? i'm not in pajamas
I act like a psycho to keep y'all away from me
Really i need it for someone to pray for me
Not your best interest to mess up and play wit me
Sleep wit one eye cause you ain't gon' go stray from me
They say they can feel me but they are not able
Bitch i'm watchin' Netflix and you stuck on cable
They once was a friend now they out of my stable
I still hope you eat but just not at my table
I'd say i'm the realest but that is a fable
Got so many problems can't give 'em no label
My head just be spinnin' like Hanukah dreidel
This is the mind of the fucking unstable
You tell me to get it together i'm tryin
"Truth" is my handle you know i ain't lyin'
She think that it's fake when i say that I'm dyin' but baby I'm out of control
I struggle wit harming my arms do be bleedin'
they say that they here but i think They deceivin'
I never reach out when i know that i need it say baby it's out of control
I'll talk to Alexa before i approach you
You too hard to reason wit i cannot coach you
That's what they be tellin' me like they supposed to my baby I'm not in control
I try to convince that I'm actually healin'
This music is where imma say what i'm feelin'
If pull the plug is it ground or the ceiling
It's not in my fuckin' control (Truth)

Written by:
Elijah Melchiorre

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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