Epic Beard Men - Shin Splints

Don't stop, we don't quit
Epic Beard Men, we the ultimate

Fading fading back from black on
The mattress in Hackensack
We in Jersey birds chirping trees
It hurts to breathe
Surgically reconstruct last night’s
Blurry scene urgency quiet kinda worries me

You ever get that feeling like
You gotta be somewhere? (Yes)
Now I’m creepin’ down the
Stairs in my underwear (Dress)
Okay, my phone was in the
Microwave with 3% left
Displayed 30 missed calls
Voicemails and texts so lemme check

Hey, B, just checkin’ to see if you’re up
Got the early flight to Europe, word up
Yo, man, you gettin’ my texts? Hit me back
If you’re already here I’m around back
Where you at? Boy! Answer your phone!
It’s check-in time this the second time
This why we supposed to do this ahead of time
It’s packed with people here
So I’mma step in line skip ahead counter 9

Shin splints (time to take flight)
Shin splints (run)
Shin splints (come on we gotta go) ahh

Had to fix a flat tire
With a gypsy cab driver
Doing 60 in the breakdown lane, hit a divider
Though that’s not the kind of mileage
That I’m known to embrace
I told ‘im "take us to warp
Ace i’m tryin’ to fold space'

When I hopped out the Taurus, no bull
He disappeared in a pink vape cloud (cool)
I’m a generous critic had to
Give him four stars
I was beggin’ forgiveness
Sage was waitin’ at the door like

You are late

My bad

So late

Sir, your bag is overweight

Alright start dumpin’ shit now we
Gotta go to the gate

I’m outta space
Gotta couple things here that you can take

No, no way
Throw the beard essential oils in the trash

Why you mad?
Get the vinyl out the carry-on and
We can make the dash

We just need our instrumentals and
Our merch to sell
Gotta travel lightly or your
Legs'll hurt like hell

Shin splints (I’m in the passing lane)
Shin splints (even if the car’s stolen)
Shin splints (time to take flight) ahh

Made it to security and you already know
The TSA was puttin’ on a helluva show
There’s no liquids
(No) aerosols (No) gels (No) creams (No)
Quick quick, here we go
Line up with the screen
I was tryna be discreet when
They pulled me outta line
10 minutes before my final check-in time
Realized when I saw the vape
Juice that they had
I grabbed the wrong bag out
The back of the cab

Fuck it
Leave it all behind we’re a terminal away

And right about then they announced our delay

5 minutes nice
Yeah, man what’s this? This is fun (finally)
The Admiral’s Lounge
(this is fun, Casa Bonita)
The Admiral’s Lounge look what we found
We’re in the Admiral’s Lounge
Let’s see what this lounge is all about
It goes down in the Admiral’s Lounge

Should we
A: Walk right on over to the freebies?
B: Ask for the code to the wee fee?
C: Tell ‘em that we need our feet rubbed?
Well the answer is D: All of the above

I’m lyin’ vertical with thangs
Inserted in my veins
For optimal hydration now they’re
Servin’ us drinks
I had this murderous rage but
It’s all meltin’ away
I could get used to this…yeah
We’re in the Admiral’s Lounge
Admiral’s Lounge admiral’s Lounge

Yo, Sage, we gotta turn the page
We gotta go, son, we’re late again

Oh, shit! Sprint!

Run run shin splints
Run run shin splints
Ahh

Jumpin’ out my seat like don’t
Fail me now feet
Workin’ thumb to my knuckles down on me now

Fuck a down beat

There we go, there we there we go
Past the Dolmaybe
Now we in the inconsiderate mode baby

Pass the old lady on the left hand side
Cause getting to these shows is
A matter of pride i jump the cat carrier
Run the track faster than
Ones who sat passive
But clung to fat baggage I shove
And act savage, now you learnin’ the pace
Who the hell ever heard of a terminal change?
Took a shuttle to a subway through
A tunnel for a shuttle cramped up
Cut me! the champ is getting bloody!

And we pushin’ all the dummies who’re
Standing in the left lane
Of the sidewalk I’m distraught
With the chest pain
Dealin’ with the leg pains
Devoted to the endgame of leavin’
On this motherfuckin’ jet plane

Get to gate! Tell ‘em to wait!

Shin splints shin splints
Shin splints ahhhh
Shin splints shin splints
Shin splints shin splints
Shin splints fuck!

They sayin the flight is tomorrow

Of course

Jesus

Yeah

Written by:
D, BERNARD JR DOLAN, BERNARD JR OLAN

Publisher:
Lyrics © Wixen Music Publishing, BMG Rights Management

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