Nebseye & MIDES - more than me.

Yeah, I- started writing cause I've been hoping you'd call
I'm scribbling out these words like I'm going through a withdrawal
You were the one I turned to when I was against the wall
Now I'm stuck up in the air and I'm hoping that I don't fall, but
It's been a minute since you have paid me a visit
And recently I've noticed the precedent I've been missing
My struggles everyday never lessen, I'm at my limit
You used to save me but now you're pressing me up against it
And now I'm in a place where I'm waiting on what is over
Thankfully I've been sober, making me wish we closer
Every minute I live afraid, I'm used to it
Maybe I should just ball up my fists and move through it
Making all of the moves that you miss, I still do it
And even when you never caught on, I still threw it
After 80 days of controlling my mind heavy
You helped me come to terms with the fact that I wasn't ready
But having all of this time to reflect
Has given me a perspective I couldn't grasp
And if I knew this the last day that I would ever wake up
I would hope we'd make up
And maybe one day relish the shit that we stayed away from
Craving meaning in games and coming up on a change
Irrelevant to us when we both always feel the same
So now I understand all the things that I last feared
Have really ripped apart both our minds for the past year
I've been struggling, the lonely is smothering me
In ways that I fear are turning me from what's real
And guiding me through a side of me that I don't want to see
Characterized by very dark thoughts
The things that I'd rather be, but I'd rather see
You succeed with someone and please, if it isn't me
At least leave your heart on your sleeve
Cause I've been drowning in an ocean of love
But I've been fine, you haven't seen the side
Cause that's what I've been trying to hide, listen

I know that maybe you don't want to hear from me
Seemingly the care that you had disappeared to me
Recently that hair on my back's at a solid stand
Cause watching you with others is under my damn skin
I want to heal your soul, and maybe there's not a chance
But I'll be damned if I throw this letter away again
I won't accept defeat, not asking to get revenge
Just want you to understand that when I see you in mess, I pray
And I'm not even really rocking with God
I don't organize my thoughts like I'm under the cross
And I don't charter out my love like I'm somebody's boss
Narcissism don't always mean that I'm out of touch, see
I now understand the ways I act in despise
I look inside the mirror, but staring back is your eyes
I did a lot of stupid shit every single night
Sick of swimming through my problems pretending that it's alright
Hard to act like I've been fine when I'm knowing I miss you
Many people telling me that I should forget you
Those I hope to see has fail are handing us tissues
I hope the double-sidedness is starting to hit you
Sometimes I get urges that I hope you're in pain, see
But I suppress these feelings for the sake of your safety
I wanna see you happy even if you don't date me
Protecting you's the mission, even if you escape me
But now I need to realize that maybe I'm in control
And what's the point of leaving, the gun is already smoked
I'm choosing to pick change instead of holding my pride
I just hope you play along and don't put an end to the ride
Cause I'm finally aware of the ways that my love'll show
And I should take some action if I'ma get out this hole, so
Here's a little letter I wrote 'bout our rocky past
I think it explains it, I'm hoping you hit me back

I always try to be patient with you, I mean that we're basically two
And I've been afraid to be foolish and walk away from
What I've been chasing with you, and I felt complacent with you
But now that you're gone, we're two sides of the same gun
I guess I've finally come to terms with the many notations
I wasn't ready, but ever since you've aborted me
I've talked to plenty of people trying to be steady
But honestly, you just may be the only one I love more than me

Written by:
Blake Abbott

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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