Jon Lajoie - Wtf Collective

[MC Confusing]
Other rappers are comprehensible, not me
First on the mic, MC Confusing!
I took a piss on my nutsack and called it Jack Black
It's a fact, I got more rhymes than Zach Braff takin' a nap
I attack mothafuckas wearin' purple backpacks
And I snack on towel racks then take a sh!t on your track
Yeah you're whack, 'cause everybody understands what you say
But when I get on the mic I make milk out of clay
And I play air guitar with a tube of toothpaste
And I say karate pencil case then put it on tape

[MC Insecure]
Yo I'm MC Insecure, what's up?
I really don't think that I'm good enough
To be rhymin' on this track 'cause my lyrics suck
All my verses fall flat like a hockey puck
It took me 7 months to write the first part of my verse
And now I got nothin' left so I'll pretend that I got hurt
(Ow! Ahh, I think I sprained my ankle.
You guys go ahead and finish the song without me.)

[MC Amnesia]
Yo MC Amnesia up in this bitch
Woke up 5 days ago lyin' in a ditch
Didn't know who I was, I couldn't remember sh!t
Apparently something happened that was tra-ma-tic
I used to have more rhymes but I can't remember them
Seriously, I'm freakin' out, I can't remember anything
What's my mothafuckin' name?
(Seriously, does anyone know what my name is?)

[MC Public Urination]
Yo I'm MC Public Urination, what what
I take a fckin' piss on the fckin' sidewalk
Anytime, anyplace, I just whip out my c0ck
And empty my bladder while you mothafuckas watch
You other MCs can't handle this sh!t
You're just a little bitch, 'fraid to pee in public
You run into a toilet every time you have to piss
Yo, fck that sh!t, I just whip out my dick

[MC Fatigue]
Yo MC Fatigue, yeah that's me
Everytime I grab the mic I fckin' fall asleep

[Chorus Guy]
I'm the guy who sings the chorus
(It breaks up the song)
My part is kinda boring
(I wish that I could go home)
But they're payin' me to sing the chorus
(And I really need the cash)
'Cause I'm unemployed at the moment
(Just moved back in with my dad)

[MC Doesn't Know What Irony Is]
Yo I'm MC Doesn't Know What Irony Is
Walked up to a girl and I gave her a kiss
She said "Let's go to your place, I'll suck your dick."
I said, "Hell yeah bitch, that's so ironic."

[MC Gets Side-Tracked Easily]
Yo I'm MC Gets Side-Tracked Easily
My rhymes are badass like Gandolfini
You know he's known for the Sopranos but he's also in movies
Like Get Shorty and Terminal Velocity
Which I didn't really like 'cause I don't like Charlie Sheen
Well I guess in Hot Shots he was kinda funny
But I prefer Leslie Nielsen in the Naked Gun
You know who else was in that movie? O.J. Simpson
Which is kinda weird knowin' what he did after that
Wait, what was I sayin'? I think I got side-tracked

[MC Lethal Weapon 1, 2, & 3]
Yo I'm MC Lethal Weapon 1, 2, & 3
I really liked those movies but the 4th disappointed me
Danny Glover, Mel Gibson, and Joe Pesci
Why did they have to make a 4th? They had a perfect trilogy

[MC Lethal Weapon 4]
MC Lethal Weapon 4, that's me
I disagree with MC Lethal Weapon 1, 2, & 3
Although I agree that it is a ground-breakin' trilogy
The 4th was also good, they added Chris Rock and Jet Li

[MC Sh!t My Pants Frequently]
Yo I'm MC Sh!t My Pants Frequently
It usually happens when I'm walkin' down the street
Or when I'm hangin' out with some fly ass hoes
There we go, thank god I brought a change of clothes

[MC Final Verse]
Yo I'm the MC with the final verse
I'm supposed to sum up everything you heard
But mothafuckas, I don't really have the time
So fuck that and go back to the chorus guy

[Chorus Guy]
I'm still singin' the chorus
(Thank god wer're almost done)
I hate singin' the chorus
(It's such a boring fuckin' job)
I'm gonna take my 40 bucks
(That's what they're payin' me)
And I'm gonna go get really drunk
(Masterbate then go to sleep)

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Lyrics © TUNECORE INC, TuneCore Inc.

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Jon Lajoie

Jon Lajoie

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