TYDY - Scallion Pancake Adventure

This day only, come taste the greatest sensation of flavor this world has to offer. Extraction of paprika will enwrap the senses with aromas you have never smelled or dealt before. With our signature world famous, award winning, Michelin star rated, all you can eat Scallion Pancake.

Located at...

Dude, I'm so hungry.
Wait, what is this?
(Commercial)
This place looks amazing.
We should go there.

Dude, the TV exploded.
Uh, we need that scallion pancake.

So, Tyler and I hopped into my car
Ol Chevron Cavalinsky.
Tyler said, I hope this place isn't very far.
I smacked him in the face and said, Shut up! I'm driving!
But I didn't know where we were going!
What streets to turn on.
What signs to follow.
North, South, East or West,
I wasn't discouraged, not even a little bit,
Cause we're hungry and reckless on a quest for the best.

Mortified, fortified, rectified, bonafide, glorified, petrified,
Scallion pancake.
Mystified, electrified, mummified, oil fried, contextualized.
Scallion pancake.

Look at that there deli, they must have what we're looking for.
They probably have every vegetable in the world.
They're advertising their Tuesday Special.
Let's go inside for a better look.

She likes to eat her steak, she said,
She eats her broccoli.
But I am just a lettuce leaf,
Come from a lettuce tree.

There are no pancakes here
Just hot dog buns.
Try the place down the street,
They're serving breakfast for lunch.

Woah buddy, you're going too fast! We're going to crash
I don't want you to smash your bumper and your gas tank is less than half!
Better double strap my seatbelt before I break through the glass!
Tyler, I've got this. I know where I am going.
Remember when we drove up the mountain when it was snowing?
I can drive all day and night. I can drive in any weather,
whether it displays red, yellow, or a green light.

Mortified, fortified, rectified, bonafide, glorified, petrified,
Scallion pancake.
Mystified, electrified, mummified, oil fried, contextualized.
Scallion pancake.

Look at that there Breakfast Nook, they've got all the fixins.
Their secret batter is what they've been mixin.
Only a few more minutes till they're closing shop.
But all we're missin' is a space in the parking lot.

What is this peculiar thing on my plate?
Mystery Puff.
Are you not grilled,
filled with a random meat?
Always a thrill to eat
With mayonnaise.

I am the peculiar thing on your plate.
Mystery Puff.
Your magic spell.
Tell me all what you need,
Nothing I haven't seen
In all my days.

Where is that delectable pan made of cake?
Tell us the location
we need.
Is it inside the fridge?
Microwaved on a dish
in cellophane?

There's a rumor of a great guy who had a taste.
Beef Jerkey River is
the place
Where you will need to go
and find what you need to know.

But someone stole my car!

My car's been just like a car to me.
Cruising in my Chevron Cavalinsky.
And now I don't know what to do or don't.
Well, you can just take the boat down the Beef Jerkey River!

Attention, ladies and germs. Welcome to The Beef Jerkey River!
Please keep your arms and leg inside the water vehicle at all times.
Make sure you listen to everything I say and do what I do and do what I don't, thats right

Beef Jerkey River,
Turkey, lurkey, gurkey,
Beef Jerkey River,
Turkey, lurkey, gurkey.

The Beef Jerkey River ain't what it used to be,
ain't what it used to be,
It used to be more rivery.
The Beef Jerkey River ain't what it used to be,
Like it was yesterdoo.

Oh, yesterday,
Tony Clifton walked.
He showed us the way.
Oh, yesterday
Oh, yesterday
Tony Clifton talked
International Singing sensation
Hear what he's got to say

You boys got your cheese? huh?
I didn't ask if you cut the cheese, I asked if you got your cheese.
I got the wings of a dove, I've got the wings,
I've got the Kentucky fried.
Woopty doo, woopty dy, stick a needle in your eye!
Oh, you're looking for the scallion pancake.
Yeah, I know a place. I played there back in 92!
The Palace! They owe me money!
I'll take yous there, but I'm busy!

I see someone pulling up front in your car.
Shredded Lettuce
From the first place.
I was a wilty leaf,
Now I'm a shredded beast
And I'm green.

Over by the hospital where I found your car.
Chevron Cavalinsky
is fine.
Saw the ad on TV,
I know where we need to be,
honestly.

So, me and Tyler hopped into my car.
We made three rights and ended up on Something or Other Boulevard.
And right there in front of us, big lights on the marquee.
We made it to The Palace.

Welcome to The Palace,
Do you have reservations?
Table for two please.
Ohhh, that's going to be a two hour wait.
What? We came all this way. Through perilous danger and destruction. Ate a mystery puff, rafted down the Beef Jerkey River of doom. (yeah, we almost drowned!) and you say we have to wait?!! This is unacceptable. Where is your manager?? We require immediate assistance.
Wait, what is that?!

Its the electrified!
Its the glorified!
Its the oil fried!
Its the Scallion Pancake!

Scallion pancake,
I want a pancake!
Mix it with Bisquick,
Biscuit with syrup,
Flip it and dip it,
chip it in chocolate.
Scallion pancake,
I want a pancake!
It shouldn't take long,
So we'll sing our song
And wait for it to bake!

Scallion pancake,
I want a pancake!
Mix it with Bisquick,
Biscuits with syrup,
Flip it and dip it,
chip it in chocolate.
Scallion pancake,
I want a pancake!
It shouldn't take long,
So we'll sing our song
And wait for it to bake!

Scallion pancake,
I want a pancake!
Mix it with Bisquick,
Biscuits with syrup,
Flip it and dip it,
chip it in chocolate.
Scallion pancake,
I want a pancake!
It shouldn't take long,
So we'll sing our song.
You don't want this to be end of story,
But it is.

Good evening, goblins and ghouls.
On tonight's Terrifying Tuesday,
Beware The Reheated Chicken
You won't be alive come dinner time.

Written by:
Dylan Bressler, Tyler Kamen

Publisher:
Lyrics © KAMEN ENTERTAINMENT GROUP INC

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