Biggie Oof - Below Zero

They say what you don't know can't hurt you
But I say that's a ding-dang lie
They've never met a mathematician
Never looked them in their cold, dead eyes
Tell me why when I hit seventh grade
There seemed to be some kind of debt I had to repay
With my toiling and suffering — my sad little brain
Couldn't wrap around such a thing
Back then, puberty may have been my worst nightmare
But there was another thing that had me three times as scared
Negative numbers, you don't even exist
So why you gotta treat me like this?
What did I ever do to you
To deserve such a thing?
Negative numbers, you don't even exist
So why you gotta treat me like this?
Below zero is where you should stay
Go back from whence you came
Accountants must be miserable
Dealing with these terrors all day long
When they go home, do you think they see them
On the backs of their eyelids?
My seventh grade textbook says that it's easy peasy
But let me tell you now, it's not lemon squeezey
If you ask me, I think it's delusional
Learning fake numbers should be unconstitutional
If I were a math teacher, I would have nightmares
From all the guilt of the math horrors that I have shared
Negative numbers, you don't even exist
So why you gotta treat me like this?
What did I ever do to you
To deserve such a thing?
Negative numbers, you don't even exist
So why you gotta treat me like this?
Below zero is where you should stay
Go back from whence you came
On the number line, you're to the far left
On a graph, you're beneath the x-axis
Without you, I would no longer be bereft
I think this should classify as mathematical malpractice
End my suffering, cut out the negative numbers
Just tell me that this painful math is all over
Take me back to the days of 2 + 2
That's all I ask of you
Negative numbers, you don't even exist
So why you gotta treat me like this?
What did I ever do to you
To deserve such a thing?
Negative numbers, you don't even exist
So why you gotta treat me like this?
Below zero is where you should stay
Go back from whence you came

Written by:
Sarah Futrell

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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