John Paro - Drinking Bleach (Sarcastically)

Uuuuh
Uhhhhh
Babe Is that the alarm clock
Uhhh
I’m hitting snooze, kay
I think it might be Tuesday
Or Wednesday or Thursday
Its one of those blurred days
But a new day, and hooray
It’s good to be alive
I no longer want to cry
On every day that end in Y
Quarantine good morning
Good morning
I’ve got some new TP to wipe me
No more existential crises
Gonna zoom bomb someone tell them good morning
Well I went on a drive to the grocery store
And again I find that I notice more
People keep wearing N95s ‘cause they don’t seem to care who those are for
Karen, Kyle, its been a while, but come here - we can share the aisles
He’s juvenile, says no to masks
She’s got a respirator and some yoga pants
And shouldn’t wear either on principal
And those gloves don’t make you invincible
Normally I’d be pissed like I missed the bus
And come to verbal sarcastic fisticuffs
But listen up because truth be told it’s not worth energy to offend her
And if you a need a reminder life’s beautiful just watch a shirtless scene with Chris Hemsworth
It’s ok Kyle every gender and race knows he’s heaven sent
If you get emails you know that times are strange and unprecedented
I was having a good day in case it’s not evident
Then I turn on the news and I see the face of the president
I was doing OK but then I hear this guy say
Blood pressure skyrockets at every press conference
Each time he opens his mouth some of my sanity sneaks out like
What the hell dude, that’s not a thing that you can do
Ah, that’s just Trump being trump you say, emphatically
And forward me some 4chan meme that’s incorrect grammatically
Do you think that he’ll just magically
Start acting diplomatically
And begin to see the tragedy
Of drinking bleach sarcastically
Ah ok I guess you’re just an optimist
Or gobblin’ Fox n Friends like some MAGA hippopotamus
‘Cause if botching the response to this was a business he’d own stock in it
Head so far up his own ass that in fact he has a staff proctologist
The problem is obvious so says this California communist
And oh also like every single goddamn epidemiologist
Cause if every metropolis opens too quickly then I fear the populous might start Vanishing faster than than the backbone of Mitch McConnell did
I know its tiring when we fight all the time
But listen its also exhausting being right all the time
I’m kidding
Civil discourse shouldn’t be a thing of the past, yo
But if you vote for him admit - you’re at least a bit of an asshole
Future seems bleak every time this dude speaks
Commander in chief but I demand a refund
No you can’t, No you can’t, No you can’t bro
What the hell are you talking about
At the close he just leaves off the stage back to his handlers
And goes off and tweets in a rage to all his challengers
Im Holdin coffee in a daze, man JD Salinger
More phony than the recent displays of Adam Sandler
Had a couple good minutes this morning
This morning
But they were ruined by this shit head
Now I gotta put my kids to bed
We can do it all again in the morning

Written by:
John Paro

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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