Zelda and the Unibrows, Joseph C. Krause, Paul Szewczyk and Samuel Seed - How I Lost My Body

When you die, you become a ghostAnd you get to haunt peopleAnd make parts of the room too coldFor no reason

Someone else renovates your houseCuts down the tree you plantedAnd puts their children's garish plastc playhouse on the lawnNear the stump
"C'est la vie," your grandson snickersSpending his inheritance on game consoles and action figuresCraigslisted the clarinet you bought him
Go ahead and try and haunt himShow up as an artifact of lens flare on his Flickr forumBut it won't work because you're dead!
When you die, those you love the mostDress up to view your body Then go out to The Waffle House To eat pancakes
The priest aims to form a schismChecking his notes for your name and dwelling on your atheismStand up, sit down, and look at the carpet
He looked so good in his coffinCan I have his iMac?Let's go to this Waffle House more oftenMore coffee, waitress, I'm so cold!
Electronics help me to findEctoplasmic residueLeft upon your bowling trophiesFor a fee of $9.99 I will come back each day toExorcise your toaster oven
Scorpio, your stars have alignedOnce your check clears you will Initiate into the mysteries
Close your eyes and open your mindDeep within this talisman Is the secret of clairvoyance
When you die you become a ghostAnd you get to haunt peopleAnd make parts of the room too cold For no reason
Go ahead and try to haunt himShow up as an artifact of lens flare on his Flickr forumBut it won't work because you're dead!
With this meter I have divinedWhy your haunted microwaveCauses grapes to give off plasma
Your dead grandma is trapped in timeWon't you help her find her peaceBy enrolling in my classes?
Ram this lingham into your shrineImmolate your amuletPlease present your painted pebbles
Sancte deu! That's the wrong spellYou've opened the door to Spirit realms and ghostly places
Demons come from portals to hellThey're here to evisceratePeople who have not repented
La dae dee dee (etc) AHH!

Written by:
Joseph C. Krause

Publisher:
Lyrics © TUNECORE INC

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