DJ Cul de Sac - Lonesome Hugh

So this is my story, my name is lonesome Hugh
I'm unlucky in love, no matter what I do
My last girlfriend didn't want to see me no more
I wouldn't mind but she was blind, could it have been such a chore
My next lady just stopped coming around
Which hurt as she was homeless living in the underground
Linda said that us meeting up didn't feel right
I said come on now Linda, you're a lady of the night
Alice opted to return to Afghanistan
Over being a visa bride, with me as her man
Mary said she found me a mystery
Yet she was a private detective, so how could that be
Glenda said life with me was taking its toll
Which wasn't great given Glenda was a high end sex doll
Sally said we weren't singing from the same hymn sheet
But as she's an atheist, that one had me beat
Fiona felt we weren't going anywhere
Given her agoraphobia, is that critique fair
And you know when it's not gonna be your week
When Donna the dominatrix moans that you're too mild and meek
Polly professed to being a lesbian
Before proceeding to date my best friend Ken
In a discussion with Susan about safe sex
Her immediate suggestion was abstinence
Penny said the real reason she was the girl on my arm
Is that dating me was painful and she's into self-harm
Another ex moaned we weren't compatible
Which was fair as I liked her, but she didn't like me at all
Carla called it off due to her fear to commit
But I'd only asked her out for coffee, so was that legit
Enid ended it saying we didn't click
I tried asking what that meant and she said boy are you thick
Gerri had IBS and still left me based on a gut feeling
The lack of logic in that, sure left me reeling
Aaron said that it just wasn't in the stars
She's an astrologer so arguing that was hard
And when Betty the Buddhist couldn't tolerate me
You've got to start to wonder if I'll always be lonely
Yes that there's my story, my name is lonesome Hugh
I'm real unlucky in love, that much is true

Written by:
DJ de Sac

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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