V.P. The Apex - Watch, Flock, Di$per$e

Born into a broken military family, I was a fluke, I was created me accidentally
My parents split hella early, my dad would hit my mom, sadly. I wonder if it was because of me

The anger understandable, the action not so much
But By 7 I, realized there was no US
On a path paved with hate, way way too young
2 years down the road, who knew what was to come, the stepdad who despised his step son
They found a house, far away, from my friends that kept my head up
Hated at home, sitting alone at lunch
Always picked on, seeing no love, my mind switched up at 12, there I lost all my fucks

Fun fun for the kid, always locked up in his room for petty shit
For months and months I'd sit, they turned to years feeling nothing so Instead I'd slit my wrist
Which only made things worse for him, instead of locked in his
Room they took him to a hospital, on suicide watch, for weeks, damn that place was so grim

I was snapping too, raging, cause I hated it, then theyd stick the needle in
My ass, to keep me heavily sedated
Filled with so much hatred, I became emotionless and vacant
Wanted to die, I couldn't take it
Finally I broke into their game and I played it
Nothing got better but worse, cause I would hide it
In the back of my mind, I still long for the reason and I fiend for a purpose
Cause all I see is a loop of competition and people who would happily hurt us
Or murk us for a dollar tho

What's the point, why do we bother go
To that 9-5 every morning, minutes ticking down, are our lives really ours to own?

People come and go, on the sidelines I count the clones
And watch the flock disperse, the blinded murder of crows

Time flies by, like their feathers in the wind
I found the music and my homies then I felt like maybe not everything is meaningless

This is only part portrayal, for the complexity is deep
See I was on and off medicines during these years
Cause they said there was something wrong with me
Although I've always been smart, it's a burdan I carry
Being trapped in your brain, you cant feel your heart barely

Written by:
Vaughn Peters

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid

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